The Whale Is Singing Our Song

Country Squire’s New Blend

The Country Squire isn’t exactly a leviathan when it comes to pipe tobacco blenders, but they know how to do small batch blends right. They are actually small batches. In this case they used what they had left from the McClelland stock which was in storage. I have been waiting all weekend to feature this, I even put it in the newsletter. Then when I go to write this and grab the link, I see they are sold out. CRAAAAAAAP!

What stinks, for me, is that it’s actually a small batch. I can’t just wait until next year and get it when it will miraculously reappear for another limited run. I’m certainly happy for them since making it up and getting it out the door has to be a good feeling, but what was I thinking? So already the very first item to lead off the Blob after a long weekend falls flat on it’s face. And even worse, I’m Whale Songless. Doesn’t this job come with any kind of perks? A little insider information once in a while could pay off. But not this time.

Channels Hitting Milestones

Also mentioned in the newsletter are two channels that hit nice round numbers. Trailing The Woolly Mammoth is right on 500. I’d like it much better if it were 501, so someone please take care of that. I enjoy his videos, and now that he’s showing some watch movement action I can’t resist. You would think I’d be sick of that. A Ronda 515 coil? I wouldn’t take the time to fix it, probably have a dozen in a drawer. I’d just take a minute and throw a new one in.

Look what I’ve become. Get ’em in, get ’em out. He takes the time to fix it right and I’m the pro. I’m not saying what I do is wrong, but it’s nice to see a guy doing it the right way. At least the way I like. The cost of everything has gone through the roof. The price of that movement has probably tripled in the last 20 years. I’d buy them six at a time (watch parts are usually ordered by the dozen or fraction there of). I really enjoyed his video. Now all he has to do is learn to sit back and light his pipe while he checks his work.

Also Mr. Greg Tunnel at The Tunnel Take who’s numbers have been all over the place crossed the six hundred mark. That knife he’s giving away is something else. I’m sure many people will want in on that drawing. Take a look at his video and see for yourself.

Congratulations to both Dave and Greg.

We Got Piped

Got a very nice mention in the latest episode of the Get Piped podcast. They were so kind that it now worries me. They have set the bar much too high. Before it was easy to sit back and rest on our low expectations. Now I’ll have to try to live up to what Adam said about our website, which quite frankly sounds like too much work. 

When will I be able to squeeze my naps in? Very humbled to be talked about by The Country Squire’s YouTube Channel of the Year award winner. 

Sort Out This Mess For Us

As mentioned in this week’s newsletter, I’ll give you a quick rundown of the different sources of content you can find throughout  the vast Briar Report Media Empire.

Our main website and what we call the News site, can be found here. It is the Briar Report website. It is the World’s Premier source of pipe smoking news and information.  You may recognize the format as a certain news aggregator appears to have copied the idea from me.

The magazine website is located here. Similar to the news site, but a .org domain.  It has all of our original content. A little of this, a little of that. Nothing to write home about, but worth reading.

On that site you can view our Events Calendar. Which long time readers know is the most accurate, up to date, error-free calendar on the internet.  Worth it’s weight in Bitcoin. 

Also, know that if you have an event or want to promote something you have going on, all you have to do is let me know and I’d be happy to add it to the Events Calendar. is the way to go.

What You’ve Been Waiting For

Then there is our world famous Blob. Part of the magazine website. It’s actually a blog, but I didn’t know that was the correct name when I started it, and it’s too late to change it now. So we are just sticking with Blob.

It’s a M-F publication with a bonus Blob sometime during the weekend. The gift that keeps on giving. Please no VD jokes.

I try to keep them fairly short so you can spend just a few minutes. It will have pipe community news and various nonsense. Monday’s are always longer since people click over from the newsletter and I take advantage of it and try to put something just a little more substantial. But if you’re not checking in everyday, you’re missing out. That’s what Mr. T would say, if Mr. T read the Blob. At least I’m pretty sure he would say that.

You can find us on various “Social Media” hot spots. Like the septic tank of the internet, Twitter. Not a big presence, at least not anymore. I bite my tongue more often than I care to admit. I spend too much energy trying not to get banned, but the truth is the best thing that could happen is me getting banned. Then I could be done with it. This Blob has sort of taken place of my tweetering. So you’re better off checking here. I mostly use Twitter to announce live shows as they come on.

I’m on Instagram, although I am barely able to post since I don’t take photos or have a cell phone. Two things which that site is designed for.  Oh well, I do like looking at other people’s pictures so if you post pipe photos, let me know so I can follow you.


Finally you can find Briar Report on Facebook (don’t know the link). But to be honest, I can’t figure out how it works, exactly. I can’t even sign in. The only way I can get on is when there is a notice in my email which I can then click on.

“Padre Piper posted an update”. My computer must have the password and other necessaries memorized. If Padre never posted, I wouldn’t be able to get on the site. I must have hit some kind of notification button at one time. Good thing.

When I get there, it has dozens and dozens of notifications. So many that I’m overwhelmed. Asking me to do all kinds of things and join all kinds of groups. Sometimes I click on them, mostly I don’t.

I think I’ve only posted one or two comments ever. I wanted to put something on a Mark V.V. video, but couldn’t find the box to type it into. Ended up just clicking on the Fonzi thumb instead.

I really don’t like Social Media, don’t even like the name of it. I’d rather smoke my pipe and grumble, but for now I’m giving it an honest try.

We encourage you to check in with us everyday. It only takes a few minutes, but it give you a chance to see all those cool ads. Those ones over there on the right. Unless you’re using a cell phone, then I have no idea where they are. They better be somewhere!

The Bosses

Those are the guys that pay for all of this. They will also be paying for a lavish junket to Hawaii (all expenses paid) which they are sending me on. They don’t even know it yet, but I’ll bet they will be very excited for me as they grab their checkbooks. But it’s never gonna happen if you don’t look over there —> and click on some of those ads.

You like pipes, right? Well, they got pipes! It’s a match made in heaven.

Speaking of heaven, I wonder if the resort they are sending me to will provide a grass skirted hula girl to serve me Mai Tais while I sit on the beach smoking a pipe?