There are a few things I wanted to talk about so I better get right into it. The first is that J.C. Newman is coming out with a new Brick House cigar this week. Now before you get all excited like I did, you need to know up front that it’s one of those limited edition things. That’s usually code for I ain’t getting any. I had to look up a couple of things before I sat down to write this and one thing I found out is that it’s limited to 500 boxes. Just so you know.
The cigar is the Brick House Ciento por Ciento. That means 100%. It’s what I had to look up. They named it that because it’s made entirely with Nicaraguan tobacco. I love brick House so I’ll bet these are great. On the down side, for me at least, is not only is it a limited series but they are only going out to stores that are in the Tobacco Association of America. I don’t think my local store is. If anything they are in the the Smokin’ Joe’s Association of Native Indians. Which means I’d need for someone to go see if they could get me some. It would be at least 45 minutes from here, probably more like an hour. By the time I do that they will be gone.
That’s OK, I get enough stuff for free. I can’t complain. At least I shouldn’t.
Upcoming Pipe Tobacco “Review”?
You will see what I mean this coming week. We are taking part in a great project put on by one of the Pipe Tobacco companies. We were working on that this week. By “working” I mean trying out a tobacco and saying if we liked it or thought it sucked [expletive deleted]. Not bad work if you can get it!
You’ll find out what it was this coming week. One thing I can tell you now is that it didn’t suck [expletive deleted]. Watch out for it in the magazine in two weeks, or maybe one week. The beginning of August. I don’t know when he’s going to print this. I’m sure you can’t wait to see what I have to say. I just made one of those sarcastic noises with my mouth huffing out air. You’re here to see what I say about stogies, not pipe tobacco, but hey, you never know.
Wow, the column is already half over and I’ve talked about a new cigar that I’ll never smoke and a pipe tobacco I can’t tell you what it is. This is about as interesting as that music they play on the saxaphone radio station.
So, this past week a guy I know says to me he has some cigars and wanted to take care of them proper. He got a small humidor. He knew you had to put water in it, but wasn’t sure what to do exactly.
The first thig I told him to do was go to the Voodoo Review internet [Voodoo Review Blog] and see what he wrote about getting a small starter humidor. In it he shows those packs you can get at the cigar shop. I think they are $2. Just to give him some ideas.
Keep It Simple, Stupid
Now I know there are guys out there that could write a book on setting up and maintaining a humidor, I’m not one of those guys. Not only am I low tech. I don’t go in for all that fancy stuff. Before I tell you what I do, I’ll tell you right off, you follow my advice at your own risk. It’s not that I might be giving you bad advice, it’s just that I think people go way further than they need. I’m pretty much a bare-bones kind of guy.
You do need deionized water. That much I can say for sure. If you don’t you get this white crusty stuff forming in the humidor. Probably depends on where you live and how hard your water is. Just use DI water and you’ll be fine.
Sponge Bill Square Pants
Next I just take a sponge and get it all wet, not dripping wet but damp. Then I rub it all over the inside of the new humidor. You will see the wood change color. I then put that sponge on a small saucer and leave it in the humidor. Shut the lid tight and wait a day or two. Gives it time for everything to soak up that moisture.
When you’re ready to put it in service, take that box with the screen on it and the silicon balls inside and soak it in that DI water to make sure it’s all loaded up and has sucked up all the water it can. I let it sit sideways or upside-down on a paper towel for ten minutes or so to make sure it isn’t going to drip. If you don’t do that then when you put your cigars in the humidor you will get water spots on them. Most of those boxes stick to the lid with magnets or velcro and they hang upside-down. They will drip if you aren’t careful.
Once you get the plactic box in place, take the saucer and sponge out and load that baby up with your cigars.
It might be too much moisture at first but all those stogies are going to soak it up, expecially if you haven’t been keeping them right.
Within a few days everything will settle out and you can look at that dial on the outside and it will read about 70. It shows a range, just make sure you are in that range.
If you don’t check it for a long time you may notice it will drop way down. In that case take the little plastic box out and fill it with water again. Nothing to it.
Big Might Be Better, But Small Is Good Enough
Some guys have super fancy humidors that you plug into the wall and have a ton of fancy gadgets. That’s cool, and they have big expensive collections. I keep my tractor cigars in mine and whatever I can pick up here and there. [ed; “pick up”? Hmmmm]
The worst thing you can do is nothing. Your cigars will dry out and be ruined. If you go to your local cigar store they usually have a ton of empty cigar boxes. If they’re like mine they will give you one for free. Make sure it’s big enough and you can use it for a humidor. Make sure the lid shuts tight and buy one of those hockey puck looking things with the silicone in it because it won’t come with one like when you get a humidor.
Rant, Then To the Point
The final subject is going to be cigar channels on the internet. There are very few I like. Some are too fancy for me, some too foul and some look like they are put out by that guy that runs Cigar Aficianado. The one who was in love with that commie Castro. Probably has Raul in his speed dial now that his big brothe croaked. It’s funny how now when the government is coming down on pipe tobacco and cigars and they are fighting tooth and nail for cigar rights (which they should), and how they plead with the government arguing that people should be free to do what they want.
That same magazine took the first chance they got to run down to Cuba and make out with Fidel. They were down there quicker than the Roadrunner. Smooching that pig communist. Turns my stomach. I wonder what they would think if the FDA decided they would just seize the Cigar companies and let the government run them? Probably don’t even see the irony.
Back On Track
Man, did I get off track.
Anyway, I was told about a new cigar channel that just started this month. Annapolis Ash Talk. I watched their video and they seemed like some regular kind of guys. Now that’s the kind of show I like. Not know-it-alls and you can see yourself having a cigar with them.
I hope they do good. It’s hard to tell from one video but I think they will do well. Unless they start slobbering over a commie, then I’m gone.
Bill is the acting Briar Report Chief of Staff,
he is also the Managing Editor of www.stogiereport.com
To reach Bill, send email to email@example.com
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Find A J.C. Newman TAA Retailer
Here is a link to a map J.C. Newman has to find your nearest TAA retailer carrying the Exclusive Brick House Ciento For Ciento.